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Disgraced former Trinidad soccer executive makes political comeback

12:00 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
Former international soccer powerbroker Jack Warner is proving that it will take more than a swirl of corruption and bribery allegations to keep him out of the political game.
Three months after being booted from the ruling government in oil-rich Trinidad and Tobago amid reports of an FBI probe and more damning corruption allegations that rocked international soccer, Warner formed an independent party and regained his parliament seat Tuesday in a landslide.
But his political comeback, while not surprising given his wealth, is deeply worrisome, say Caribbean political analysts.
Warner’s victory has not only raised questions about the future of Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar’s weakening government coalition but it has underscored the potential dangers facing politicians throughout the Caribbean: disillusioned voters are increasingly willing to trade votes for the maverick regardless of reputation.
“There is a vacuum of political representation that is always going to be dangerous until we address it,” said Sunity Maharaj, a Trinidad journalist and political analyst. “Throughout the region, people have been starving for direct representation. When they can get someone, anyone — whether with unimpeachable character or of criminal character, or in between — the person’s character doesn’t matter so much to them as much as that person delivering to them.”
In Trinidad, Warner had long been the chief financier of one of the country’s top political parties, the Indian-based United National Congress. He had even served as party chairman before he was forced to give up the post, along with his parliament seat and national security minister’s job, in April. An ethics panel from the Confederation of North and Central American and Caribbean Football (CONCACAF) accused him and another top soccer official of fraud and embezzlement, allegations he denied.
This wasn’t his first bout with corruption allegations.
He has faced them since the 1980s, but in 2011 as vice president of FIFA, international soccer’s governing body, Warner was accused of attempting to bribe Caribbean delegates with $40,000 each to vote for FIFA presidential candidate Mohamed Bin Hammam. He also was accused of embezzling $15 million of federation funds and misappropriating $1 million in FIFA money earmarked for a reconstruction project in Haiti. According to the soccer confederation ethics panel, Warner also failed to disclose that the $25.9 million Havelange Centre for Excellence in Port of Spain, built with soccer funds, sits on land he owns, according to the report.
Warner, 70, has denied all of the allegations, calling the CONCACAF report and its allegations “baseless and malicious.”
Voters in Chaguanas West, a fast-growing community in central Trinidad, also seemed to agree.
As the man behind the scenes in Trinidad politics, Warner has had a front-row seat as voters grew increasingly disenchanted with elected officials who seem to disappear after the victory party. Making himself the exception, he has built a reputation over the years as the “indispensable” politician with deep pockets who opened his constituency office in the wee hours of the morning and remained until the last person left.
“If any member of parliament were to forget what representation means,” Warner said Tuesday during his victory speech, “he or she would be doing so at his own peril.’’


Read more here: http://www.miamiherald.com/2013/07/31/3533421/disgraced-former-trinidad-soccer.html#storylink=cpy

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Nicki Minaj finally responds to the proposal. This is her official answer.

5:17 PM | Posted by | Edit Post

We've had a congratulations gift ready to be SENT!
And after watching her waltz around in some seriously frosty bling, we have been on pins and effing needles to hear what Nicki Minaj has to say in response to DJ Khaled's HALF-A-MILLION dollar proposal!!
But wait no more! Minajesty has spoken! And she says:
"Khaled is my brother and Khaled was not serious with that damn proposal, ya’ll. Please let it go. He was kidding. He’s not attracted to me, he doesn’t like me. We’re brother and sister."

Did he get friend zoned???!!!!

Well shizz! There go our white balloons…
LOL just kidding!! Obviously this was a joke, but there was still a possibility of it turning into a full-fledged wedding! With Nicki, you never know!
But we'll just have to wait to see her walk down that aisle. And we're sure she's totes cool with that.
She explains her reaction to the crazy proposal:
"It was just another way for him to kinda give the world a glimpse on the feeling of this record. Nobody in my real life took it seriously. Everybody just hit me like, 'LOL. Yo, Khaled is crazy.' I was shocked just like the rest of the world and I was cracking up laughing with the rest of the world ’cause Khaled is a master at what he does."

Just as I expected! It was nothing more than a publicity stunt!! 
Clearly!
Way to pump some publicity, Khaled.
Even though it was crazy, it was crazy cool! And cute!
[Image via WENN.]

BREAKING NEWS: WARNER WINS CHAGUANAS WEST

10:14 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
Jack Warner completed almost three months of campaigning with a resounding victory in the Chaguanas West by-election by sweeping aside all other candidates.
Warner, the former Member of Parliament for Chaguanas West under the United National Congress (UNC) banner, formed his own party, the Independent Liberal Party (ILP) after his bid to seek re-election as a UNC candidate was rejected.
In a campaign that turned bitter at times, Warner steadfastly refused to say anything negative against Prime Minister and UNC political leader Kamla Persad-Bissessar.
During his victory speech Warner said: "It was not easy but the voice of the people is the voice of God."
"Tonight a new era has dawned," he said.
Up to the point of Warner's victory speech the results showed he had collected 69 per cent of the votes with 12,631, compared to the UNC's Khadijah Ameen, 5126, with just a few polling station count outstanding.
Source: http://www.trinidadexpress.com/news/BREAKING-NEWS-WARNER-WINS-CHAGUANAS-WEST-217493931.html

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How many women has the PlayBoy founder Hugh Hefner slept with?

9:00 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
The 86-year-old Playboy founder told Esquire magazine that he has bedded at least a thousand women, proving that the creepy smoking jacket he wears must come with some sort of built-in aphrodisiac which lures women in like a bad Lifetime movie.

If Hefner was the type to put notches in his bedpost, he probably would have cut his mattress down to the floor by now, because with numbers like that, there’s no amount of math that could train a man to count that high:

How could I possibly know? Over a thousand, I’m sure. There were chunks of my life when I was married, and when I was married I never cheated. But I made up for it when I wasn’t married. You have to keep your hand in.”

Hand? Look, if you’ve slept with enough women to fill a ’50 Shades of Grey’ reading by Ryan Gosling, you should know hands don’t count, where numbers are concerned.

Hefner is now on his third marriage, to Crystal Harris — which means men the world over have one less dude to worry about competing with when it comes to scoring.

LIES You’ve Been Told About CELLULITE

3:00 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
Cellulite Gone – Bikini On
The truth is: most people really don’t know what “cellulite” actually is, or, what causes this odd appearance of the lower body trouble zones…”
This is no surprise as there actually is no such thing as ‘cellulite’… So how do we get rid of something which doesn’t exist?”

Here’s the answer:
“The word, “cellulite”, was cleverly made-up several decades ago, in a European beauty-spa, to DESCRIBE the bumpy, shadowy and dimpled appearance of skin in the lower body trouble zones of the female body. (butt, hips, thighs, legs)”
The beauty spas then started cashing-in and profiting big-time by marketing “beauty” services and products to get rid of “cellulite”. And if you’re like most women who’ve been challenged by this issue, then you probably already know all of those passive and superficial beauty treatments do not get rid of the dented shadows and mushy dimples on your buns, legs and thighs.”
In order to make your lower-body smooth, tight and attractive, there are 5 steps to follow.
Here they are:
5 CRITICAL KEYS TO KILL YOUR CELLULITE
1: You cannot get rid of the dimples and shadows (cellulite) by rubbing an odd gel, weird lotion or goopy cream on your trouble zones and problem spots.
So, stop using them – as some can actually make your cellulite worse.
Despite the fact that there are dozens of supposed ‘cellulite reduction creams’ on the market, there is no possible way for any one of them, no matter how expensive, to get rid of your cellulite. Cellulite is not a skin problem. Its an underlying structural issue, that can only be corrected by reversing the cause of atrophiedmuscle fibers directly beneath your “cellulite” trouble spots.”
Since the squishy dimples and shadows are a superficial symptom of a problem below the surface; it’s impossible for the creams, lotions or gels to have any physiological impact on the cause of the issue…”
2: Risky and expensive ‘medi-spa treatments’ can only reduce your bank account – not your celluliteproblems. And there are many consumer reports about women being seriously scarred or injured as well.
Stay away from these as the FDA reports show women who’ve been scarred or injured for life.
Painful, dangerous and uncomfortable services ranging from endermologie to body-wrapping have been proven to be totally ineffective when it comes to treating cellulite. However, advertising and marketing loopholes allow these services to be cleverly marketed to desperate women who are at wits end with the unattractive dimples and shadows on the lower-body problem areas.”
3: The unattractive dimples, shadows and saggy ripples known as cellulite are not ‘genetic’ and you are NOT stuck with them forever if you have them.
Falsely believing this will prevent you from getting rid of your cellulite. So, don’t entertain this nonsense for 1 second.
These two ridiculous myths are often passed around by ‘neighborhood know-it-alls’ – and many women actually believe these 2 myths – especially if they haven’t found the right way to get rid of the cellulite. Whats even more alarming are the number of doctors who also believe in and foster these 2 demoralizing falsehoods.
Yes – it is common to see a mother and daughter, both with the lower-body “orange peel” look, BUT this doesn’t mean cellulite is genetic – it simply means both women have not found a way to lift, tone and firm the muscle layers under the dimpled, saggy skin.”
4: You can get rid of cellulite, regardless of your age – or when you began to notice it.”
Since cellulite is a structural issue (muscle) – it can be fixed with simple and unique body movements which target the cellulite areas.”
These types of moves can be followed by any woman, regardless of her age or fitness level. And it doesn’t matter if the cellulite started in the early teen years – or after pregnancy – or after menopause – it’s still a structural issue that results from soft, un-toned muscles underneath the saggy, dimpled, shadowy skin.”
5: The only proven way to permanently get rid of the dimples and shadows of cellulite is through a series of simple, yet specifically targeted lower-body movements”
These unique movements focus on lifting, shaping and toning the muscle layers so they gently push outward against the skin – to bring back the smooth, tight and sexy appearance, while burning off any excess flab, if there is any.”
This is how regular women reverse the cause of cellulite dimples and shadows… AND, if there happens to be any excess fat in those zones – it will be burned off as fuel by the muscles. This bonus of losing any unhealthy excess body-fat is nice because it reveals a great body and it works wonders for your health profile.”
BUT you won’t learn about these unique slow-tempo movements in the gym or your local health club.”
These body movements are NOT done with typical weights and machine type exercises.” “Most regular fitness instructors don’t even know about this type of targeted cellulite-killing method. (click to watch video)”
These muscle-stimulating movements can be done right at home, in total privacy.”

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NEO Nazis lure gay teens in to make an example of them.

4:41 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
Whether you are for or against homosexuality, turturing people is still wrong. Read on to find out what these people are doing in the name of "doing good". 


A neo-Nazi group in Russia has apparently enacted a disturbing campaign against lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender youth by allegedly using a popular social network to lure in victims and torture them.
The Spectrum Human Rights Alliance (SHRA), an LGBT rights group focusing on Eastern Europe, claims the campaigns — called “Occupy Pedophilyaj” and “Occupy Gerontilyaj” — were launched by former skinhead and Russian ultranationalist Maxim Martsinkevich to purportedly identify and report pedophiles. However, the group’s method may be to target male teens who respond to same-sex personals ads on Russia’s Facebook equivalent, VK.com. Group members are said to meet the boys when they show up for the supposed date; they bully the boys and even torture them, all while recording the encounters on camera.
“These self-proclaimed ‘crime fighters’ perform their actions under the broad day light, often outside and clearly visible to general public that indifferently passes by or even commend them,” writes SHRA on its website. “Video recordings of bullying and tortures are freely distributed on the Internet in order to out LGBT teens to their respective schools, parents and friends. Many victims were driven to suicides, the rest are deeply traumatized.”
SHRA points to a YouTube video showing a group of young people allegedly connected with this movement who are seen interrogating a teen boy at what appears to be a housing compound, according to a translation by The Huffington Post.
The group approaches the teen and asks him if he had come there to meet someone named “Uncle Dima.” Then they bring him over to a bench and continue the interrogation. They ask why he was there to meet Dima and the boy admits he is there to have sex, possibly for money. Although the group members mock him, they are friendly at times, and the teen is willing to admit things about himself and his sexual preference. He says who he is, where he’s from, what school he goes to and that he is 15 years old.
Toward the end of the video the aggression heightens. At one point, one person who stepped slightly out of frame and appeared to urinate into a bottle, attempts to pour the contents of the bottle onto the teen’s head. Another kicks the teen. Then the video cuts off.

Earlier this month, Russian online newspaper Lenta met with those who have joined the “Occupy-Pedofilyay” campaign to learn more about the movement.
“We do not like homosexuals,” the leader of one local gathering explained, according to a HuffPost translation. “If it was up to me, I’d kill them but the government doesn’t allow that.”
“I think practically all gay men — pedophiles,” he later explained. “Once you’ve crossed over once, you can cross over again. Today he likes boys, and then it’ll be children. They’re not suitable for life in society.”
Anti-gay sentiments across the nation have made headlines recently. Just weeks ago, President Vladimir Putin signed into law the so-called “homosexual propaganda” bill, which imposes fines upon people found guilty of sharing information about homosexuality to minors. This week, four Dutch tourists were jailed under this law.

Ever wonder how much money Facebook creator Mark Zuckerberg has?

7:30 PM | Posted by | Edit Post

Mark Zuckerberg's net worth tops $16 billion after Facebook earnings call


It's a good week to be Mark Zuckerberg. Not that there really are many bad weeks for a 29-year-old billionaire. The Facebook CEO made a lot of money Thursday (July 25), following a strong earnings report for the second fiscal quarter of 2013.

Shares in the social networking website jumped to $34.68 at the close of trading Thursday, Forbes reports, the highest price for the stock in a year. With Zuckerberg owning 425 million of those shares, he's sitting pretty, $3.7 billion richer. Not too shabby for a Thursday.

That makes Zuckerberg worth roughly $16.1 billion. It's quite a change from September 2013, when Facebook hit an all-time low price of $17.73 a share. Still, Zuckerberg is a bit off from his highest net worth, which was $17.2 billion in March 2012. He seems to be bouncing back fairly well, though. Click here to share us on facebook!

SEXTING PIC ETIQUETTE..Please read before sending nude pics!

1:23 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
As we’re all fairly aware, a man with a hilariously ironic name wascaught in a bit of a situation in which groin and chest photographswere Tweeted to various women, some of whom he clearly did not know. And before that a football hero allegendly* sent pics of his tony weiner to a woman who did not appreciate the gesture. Here’s where Anthony Weiner (and Brett Favre) went wrong and how you can send photographs of your swimsuit zones without fear of recrimination (and only some humiliation). This is what the grownups call sexting.
1) Be sexy. For guys, tumescence is of the essence. The so-called Brett Favre picture featured a flaccid wang book-ended by Crocs. I’m not sure of a more clear way to tell a woman that you’re completely uninterested in her sexually than the combination of tacky sandal thingies and soft dinghies. For the ladies, maintain your best level of grooming, don’t get too close and show some body.
2) Measure twice, cut once. Be absolutely sure that you’re sending your whatever to the right person — and not blasting it onto Twitter like Weiner. Your mom might have a great sense of humor about these things, but there will be many questions in the vein of “what kind of person are you?”
3) Don’t send dick pics (or snatch snaps) to people who absolutely don’t want them. I’m not an “expert” on “the law,” but it sounds as illegal as it is a bad idea to marry a guy named Peterson**.
4) Don’t show your face. Plausible deniability goes a very long way. Just because a sexy photograph came from your account or phone, it doesn’t rule out that it came from Google Images, was a goof or was produced with some sort of genitalia-uglying PhotoShop program.
5) Say “no” to quid pro quo. Sometimes life isn’t fair, just because someone sends you a photo of their “stuff” doesn’t mean you have to reciprocate OR use your real photo (see previous point). Extra hilarity points if you return the pic of a different ethnicity, gender or species than of you yourself.
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What does Prince Harry have to say about Prince George?

9:05 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
We knew that Prince Harry went to meet his new nephew Prince George as soon as the baby left the hospital, but we still hadn't heard him talk about it!
Well, he finally did at the Stories of Hope exhibition on Thursday.
The new uncle said:
"It's fantastic to have another addition to the family. I only hope my brother knows how expensive my babysitting charges are."
He also added that he wants to make sure the baby "has fun," and knowing Harry, that will be no problem at all!
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The TRUTH Behind BEFORE & AFTER PHOTOS

9:36 AM | Posted by | Edit Post
There is no doubt that we live in a world of manipulation, false promises and exaggerated claims. This is especially true in the fitness industry. I’ve been a personal trainer for more than 11 years, and clients and friends are always telling me about the next amazing diet or exercise program. Like Insanity or P90X hold the secrets to fat loss.

The reasons these programs become so popular is because they are presented and marketed very well. These marketing campaigns use testimonials and before-and-after transformation photos. Before I claim it’s all bullshit, I want to make it clear that there are definitely some very impressive, genuine physical transformations out there. What I do take issue with are the transformations that are manipulated with Photoshop, professional lighting, postures to degrade or enhance their look, pro tans, sucking in or pushing out a bloated belly or flexing muscles vs. not flexing to obtain an optimal look.
In my opinion, these photos are selling false or exaggerated promises of what 90 days, etc., of their program can achieve. Long-lasting results take years of consistency, hard work and dedication. Results that happen quickly are often temporary, and this is another factor that needs to be taken into account when looking at these transformations. Did the individual cut calories to starvation levels or cut out entire food groups to reach a very low body fat percentage for the photo shoot, only to rebound a few days or weeks later? This must be considered when setting your goals and expectations based on someone’s program.
I decided to take my own transformation photos to see what was possible with just a few easy tweaks. About six months ago I was around 185 pounds and about 16 percent body fat. I was feeling particularly bloated on the day, so I asked my girlfriend to take a before shot. I then shaved my head, face and chest and prepared for the after shot, which was about an hour after I took the before shot. I did a few push ups and chin ups, tweaked my bedroom lighting, sucked in, tightened my abs and BOOM! We got our after shot.



As you can see, I’m no bodybuilder, but I had enough muscle on me to catch some shadows from the all-important overhead lighting.
Just a few weeks ago I took another series of photos in an attempt to be a little more deceptive. I wanted to show a series of progressions that look like a few months of hard work and dieting. I’m about 200 pounds and 19 percent body fat in this photo series. This took under an hour to produce.

The new edition of Android us here.. Jellybean 4.3!! Whats new?

2:38 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
We’ve been waiting quite a while for Google’s latest and greatest flavor of Android to get its big update, although it’s not the Key Lime Pie (5.x) as some initially suspected, Android 4.3 Jelly Bean does bring a whole host of useful changes and enhancements.
Pick up a brand new Nexus Device here
Bluetooth Smart
As expected, Android 4.3 will be getting Bluetooth Low Energy support, or Bluetooth Smart, which brings a similar Bluetooth performance but consumes considerably less power in doing so. This, naturally, will enable users to conserve those precious droplets of battery life for more important tasks.
jb-btle
Restricted Profiles
Android 4.3 also brings advanced multi-user settings, which will allow group owners of Android devices to share a single device with any number of different profiles for each users. Naturally, it also offers restricted profiles, which enable parents and schools to restrict young Android users access to certain inappropriate content.
android 43 profiles
Not only do these profiles help with the ongoing censorship movement in protecting young people from the potential perils of the Internet, but it will also prevent the continued climate of accidental in-app purchases. Time and time again we’ve seen complaints and even lawsuits from bemused parents after their child has clocked up a huge credit card bill in purchasing virtual teacakes, but the new restrictions mean the bill payer can set restrictions in advance.
OpenGL ES 3.0
Android 4.3 was never meant to be a substantial update, and so it has proved. Most of the changes will probably be unclear to the general user, such as new OpenGL ES 3.0 support offering improved realism at the disposal of game developers, although this new implementation will finally take advantage of the multiple core processors vendors keep throwing into new devices.
And yes, if you’re suspecting it: Android 4.3 Jelly Bean does bring forward more performance enhancements. It’s safe to say that Google is in an all-out battle against lag and other small annoyances.
jb-android-43@2x
Availability
The first devices to see Android 4.3 will naturally be of the Nexus variety, with the Nexus 4, Nexus 10, Galaxy Nexus, and first-gen Nexus 7 getting the OTA update, starting today, and the new Nexus 7 2013, which gets support right off the bat will remain untouched out of the box. The Google editions of the HTC One and Galaxy S4 will also be seeing the new firmware in the near future. We’re suspecting that Android 4.3 will roll out for other devices later this year.
jbean_srgb
With Google Play Games having also been released today as a separate download, the improvements to Android are coming in swift, quintessentially Google fashion. Unfortunately, the fragmentation of the ecosystem means there’ll likely be delays in getting Android 4.3 to your perfectly compatible device, but if you’re running a stock Android smartphone or tablet, your wait will not be particularly lengthy.



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A BIRTH CONTROL Side Effect You Didn’t Know About

9:25 AM | Posted by | Edit Post
Women who do not use hormonal birth control pills experience a heightened sense of smell around the time of ovulation that women who are on the pill do not, according to a study published in Human Reproduction. As a result, Refinery 29 reports, pill-takers may be unwittingly mating with less-than-ideal specimen. According to another study, from the University of New Mexico, women who were not on the pill showed a preference for “the scent of men with symmetrical features” when they were most fertile. (Symmetry has a smell.) At least birth control users won’t be making any asymmetrical babies ;)

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Prince William and Kate introduce their son to the world!

8:01 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
Say hello to the Prince of Cambridge: Prince William and Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge left the hospital Tuesday (July 23) and introduced their child to a throng of press outside.


The prince's first photo op came a little more than 24 hours after he was born at 4:24 p.m. London time Monday (July 22). The former Kate Middleton wore a light blue polka-dot dress and handed him off to William, dressed in dark pants and a blue shirt, as they walked forward to greet photographers. The baby was wrapped in a blanket.

The parents stood for photos for a few minutes and talked to reporters for a couple of minutes before ducking back inside, where William loaded his son into a car seat and the family made its way -- with William at the wheel -- to their home at Kensington Palace a couple of miles away. 


"It's such a special time," Kate told reporters.

Still unknown is the new prince's name. "We'll have that as soon as we can," William says.

William also joked that "He's got her looks, thankfully" and more hair than he does. The new dad also says he'll remind the prince of his "tardiness" when he's older, referring to the media standing watch outside the hospital for a couple of weeks before the birth. "I know how long you've all sat out here. So hopefully the hospital and you guys can get back to normal."

The Royal Baby is here!

4:37 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
Kate Middleton and Prince William's baby has finally been announced with as much pomp and circumstance as you'd expect from a moment this ginormous!
The framed announcement was brought over to the easel and secured in place in front of the Buckingham Palace, letting all of the world know that this Prince is officially here!
Stay here for more details!
[Image via Twitter.]

Zimmerman Helps Save Family Of Four From Overturned Vehicle

3:07 PM | Posted by | Edit Post
SANFORD, Fla. (CBS Tampa) — George Zimmerman helped save the lives of a family of four that were involved in a single-car accident.

According to a Seminole County Sheriff’s Office report, the family was driving in a Ford Explorer SUV when it went off the road and rolled over in Sanford last week.
A responding deputy reported that when he arrived Zimmerman and another man helped the two parents and two children out of the vehicle.

The report states that Zimmerman was not a witness to the crash and left after making contact with the responding deputy.
No one in the car was injured.
This is the first known public sighting of Zimmerman since he was acquitted of second-degree murder charges in the death of 17-year-old Trayvon Martin last year. Zimmerman said he shot Martin in self-defense.


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Mom, Dad..You Named Me…What?

2:49 PM | Posted by | Edit Post

Jaxxon, Branlee, Scot't (Cool huh? NOPE! They are not, It only shows that the kid's parents cant spell. Read on for more on what you should NEVER name your child.




Congratulations, your wife/girlfriend/au pair is pregnant! A little bundle of colicky delight awaits you mere months from now. And one of the great joys of this period of anticipation is brainstorming all kinds of kick-ass names for your offspring.
But be warned: The power that comes with naming a child can be both intimidating and addictive, and we are currently in the throes of a child-naming crisis here in America. Seemingly rational people are naming their kids Baylynn, and Daxx, and Nirvana. Ethans are becoming Aythans. Marys are becoming Jazzmins. Wannabe elitist parents keep trying to one-up each other, as if a uniquely horrible name serves as some kind of guarantee against little Aston Martin growing up to be merely ordinary. Soon we'll be staring down an army of Apples, and the entire country will collapse upon itself. Each of us will get only a few opportunities (or if you're Antonio Cromartie, two dozen) to help in the fight against this encroaching apocalypse, so when your turn comes, please do your part by following a few simple rules.
  1. Do not invent a name. Most inventions fail. Many don't even make it past the patent stage. What makes you think a name you created out of thin air is gonna stand the test of time? There's a reason why "Jane" and "David" have hung around for so long. They're proven. They've been workshopped out in the field. That's not true of Kaydiss. You didn't even run it past a focus group. You're putting the responsibility for an entire new product launch on that poor baby's shoulders. That's a dick move. This also goes for any classic name that you deliberately mutilated. No one's gonna be dazzled that you took Christopher and turned it into Krystougher.

  2. Think real hard about whether or not a "cool" name is all that cool. Listen, I've been vulnerable to this, too—I had Duke and Rock on the list for my first son, because I'm an idiot. But I wised up, because you don't pick a name for the initial novelty of it. The name you choose needs to hold up for a long, long time. You may think naming your kid Ace will automatically make everyone think he's a fighter pilot, but the culture changes. It evolves. Names that sound kinda badass now become stale and tepid with the passage of time. If you're going to name your kid Ace, you might as well name him 1987.
  3. If you give your kid a kooky name, there'd better be a story behind it. "You see, we named her Veniss because she was conceived in a pensione outside Venice. But Tyler's grandmother just died and her name was Missy and we wanted to honor her memory. And then I thought…Veniss! Plus the name has Macedonian roots, and I'm Macedonian!"

  4. Don't abuse the letter y. It's not a real vowel. It's only a vowel when all the other vowels have been injured and you need to use the emergency third-string vowel. It's not some kind of all-purpose MEGAVOWEL that can be readily substituted for the real ones just because you think it looks cooler. Little Prysylla shouldn't have to grow up thinking her name was inspired by some kind of Croatian village. And another thing…

  5. Go easy on the "extreme" letters. I like x, k, and z as much as any competitive Scrabble player does. But these are children you're naming, not line extensions of Mountain Dew. The only reason to name your kid Jaxxon is if you really want him to grow up to be a Duke lacrosse player.

  6. Do not use double letters if you don't have to. Branlee. That's a real name. People have used it, just as they've used Kylee, Sandee, and thousands of other homemade names that deploy double e's and double n's wherever possible because…well, beecausee! It just looks betterr, doesn't it?! We're on the verge of triple letters. In two years, a Trissstyn will show up at your country day school and everyone's head will explode.

  7. Do not name your child after the following things:
    • A television network
    • An item in the Pottery Barn catalog
    • Some goddamn character in Twilight
    • A car
    • A type of New Age exercise method
    • Yourself
    • Food
    • Any celebrity baby. We already have one Moxie CrimeFighter Jillette. We don't need a second one.
  8. Consider whether that apostrophe is really necessary. It isn't.

  9. Think about the kid and not yourself. Are you giving this kid a one-of-a-kind name because you're fishing for cheap compliments? Do you want friends and family to be dazzled by your creativity? That's probably what's going on here, even if you can't admit it. A name shouldn't make a person. A person should make a name for himself. He has to go and earn it by fighting bears and seducing the wives of dictators. On his own. Without your help. So before you fill out that birth-certificate application, think hard about the person who's gonna be carrying around this name for life. Put yourself in the kid's shoes, and maybe, just maybe, you'll have the balls not to name her Brixie.

Read More http://www.gq.com/entertainment/humor/201307/nine-baby-naming-rules-2013#ixzz2ZnlKPo63 Click here to share us on facebook!
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